After the Storm
by coinoperatedbecca
Summary: AU. I wrote this for my dearest friend, Emily, for her birthday, because of her love for Soda. Strong language.


After the Storm

By Becca Dee for Emily Surovy

Disclaimer: S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders, and Mumford and Sons own "After the Storm".

_And after the storm,_

_I run and run as the rains come_

_And I look up, I look up,_

_on my knees and out of luck,_

_I look up._

I've known Sodapop Curtis since I was a little girl, we grew up in the same section of town, and I've been talkin' to him ever since I can remember. We used to go to school together, until he dropped out. He was always goin' on about how he's so stupid and should be doin' more productive things that would help his family instead of goin' to a place he hated. I tried with everything I had in me to get him to stay, but he's a stubborn boy sometimes.

Every day after school I go to the DX to see him, and every day when his boss or Steve ain't lookin' he throws me a Coke and tells me to pretend like I bought it. I sit on the curb drinkin' my Coke as he works, and in between people we sit together and talk. He's been my best friend ever since I was three and waddled into his front yard. Most girls feel like they can't tell Greaser boys nothin' because all they care about is takin' advantage of girls and lookin' at them like they're property. But, Soda's different, Soda's always been different.

On my walk to the DX, I noticed how the leaves on the trees were beginning to change, and was mesmerized by how beautiful and vibrant the reds, yellows, and oranges were. I approached Soda, who seemed to be dragging through work. He looked tired and worn, with bags under his electric eyes. He looked _sad_. The last time I ever saw him sad was when his parents died in that car crash, and I knew to expect the worst. A gust of wind plays through my hair, and I shiver.

"Hey, Pepsi-Cola," I said playfully as I shoved my hands in my jeans pockets. He sighed, and finished up cleaning an old woman's windshield. "Hey, Emily." He said in a mournful tone. The nervousness rustling around in the pit of my stomach told me that something wasn't right. I sat down on the curb, and as the car drove away he sat next to me and stayed silent.

"I know you," I said slowly. "And I know that something ain't right. What's goin' on, Soda?" I asked as he buried his face in his hands.

_Night has always pushed up day_

_You must know life to see decay_

_But I won't rot, I won't rot_

_Not this mind and not this heart,_

_I won't rot._

He looked at me, his eyes were dull. "Did you find somethin' out about Pony?" I asked loudly. A couple days ago, Soda's brother Pony and our friend Johnny Cade killed a Soc and ran away. Soda had obviously been upset about that, but he seemed worse today.

He shook his head. "No, I don't know nothin' 'bout him." He said as he kicked the pavement. "You know, things can't just be bad. They have to be fuckin' terrible."

I had never been more confused in my entire life. "Soda, quit beatin' around the bush already," I cried. "There's somethin' wrong and you ain't ownin' up to it. You know you won't get any better unless you talk about it."

Soda could never keep anything to himself, which is something I've learned time and time again in our thirteen years of friendship. He's always tried to, but in the end he's always burstin' with some type of emotion that keeps him from holdin' any type of secret.

"This fucking blows." Was all he said.

That was the first thing he said when he found out his parents died. He had been so shocked he didn't even know what emotion to feel, so he said that it fucking blew and cried. That was the first and only time I had ever seen him cry.

_And I took you by the hand_

_And we stood tall,_

_And remembered our own land,_

_What we lived for._

And at the DX I saw my best friend cry for the second time.

He obviously didn't care that he broke down cryin' at work. He sat there, on the curb sobbin' into his hands. I didn't know what to do, or how to comfort him, especially since I didn't even know what the hell was wrong with him.

He calmed himself down, and couldn't look at me. "Sandy's pregnant," He said, his voice thick with tears and sadness as he slammed his foot down onto the pavement with a loud thump.

I never liked Sandy. Yeah, she was nice, but not for Soda. I didn't think anyone was nice for him, except for me. I realized I loved him when he left school, but by that time he was with Sandy. I didn't like her, but he loved her more than life itself. He told me he wanted to marry her, and I couldn't let him see that my heart was breakin'. That night I stayed up all night and cried.

I could understand him bein' upset by this, with his brother bein' gone, and him havin' to work so hard to help Darry with the house, but if he loved her as much as he said he did, I can't imagine whey he'd be _this_ devastated.

"It's not mine, Em." He sniffs.

And then I understood.

_**And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.**_

_**And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.**_

_Get over your hill and see what you find there,_

_With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair._

I sat there, and stared at him in shock. A weird sound came out of my throat as he started to cry again. "Yeah we slept together," He said. "But that was a long time ago, it wouldn't make sense and we both know it."

I didn't know what to say, and I just sat there watching him. "I-I told her I wanted to marry her," He continued as he got sadder. "I told her I'd marry her and I'd get another job and I'd take care of her and the baby."

I thought that my worst nightmares would come true right then and there. That my whole world and any hopes that I had of actually being with him would be shot in the dark.

He started to cry harder. "She's leavin' for Florida tomorrow." Is all he said, and my breath got caught in my throat.

Ever since he'd met her, all he'd done was whine about he was gonna marry Sandy one day and they were goin' to live away from Tulsa, away from Greasers and Soc's and where people were just people. I always imagined that for him, but instead of him havin' a future with Sandy he'd have a future with me. I had everything figured out already; we were gonna get married once I was out of school, and we'd have two kids and a dog and a white picket fence—it'd be perfect.

I knew it was selfish, but I had been glad that Sandy was leavin'. Soda was too young to have a family, even though I knew he wanted one. Plus, Darry would skin his hide and I have no clue what Pony would do besides be shocked. It would be for the best.

_And now I cling to what I knew_

_I saw exactly what was true_

_But oh no more._

_That's why I hold,_

_That's why I hold with all I have._

_That's why I hold._

As Soda was stubborn and energetic, I was outspoken. I was upset for him, so upset that I could almost feel his pain. He was my best friend, and I wanted him to be happy. But I knew that Sandy's decision to leave was a good one.

"In the long run I think it'd be a good idea." I said and he looked at me, appalled.

"What?" He asked harshly. "But Em, I _love_ her. I love her more than I loved anyone else in my entire life and she's taking it all away."

"You're too young." I argued, feelings of anger and jealousy had begun to stir within my stomach, making me feel sick. "You're barely seventeen, you're a kid yourself, you shouldn't be raisin' a kid! What would Darry do?"

"You know what? Fuck Darry. Fuck what he would do, I don't give a flyin' shit anymore." Soda yelled. I've never heard him yell out in anger before, he was always happy. "Sandy's seventeen, too!" He added, his face growing red. "She's a kid too, and she's the one who actually has to go and have the kid!"

"It's not yours," I growled, so frustrated at his fool heartedness that I could barely stand it. "You know the baby ain't yours, so why would you want to help her? She deceived you!"

_I will die alone and be left there._

_Well I guess I'll just go home,_

_Oh God knows where._

_Because death is just so full and man so small._

_Well I'm scared of what's behind and what's before._

He looked like someone punched him in the face, and as the tears rolled down his shiny red face, his lips quivered, and he shouted: "God damn it, Emily, I love her! Why don't you understand, why aren't you helping me!"

My chest heaved in and out as I angrily huffed for breath, I gritted my teeth and clenched my fists at my side. Slamming them down onto the hard pavement, I screamed with the fury of a thousand suns: "Because I love _you_, God damn it!"

A blank expression made its way to Soda's slick face, and his mouth hung ajar for a few moments. Before he could say anything in response, I angrily got off my ass and started to power walk home. As I got further away from the DX, I walked faster and punched my fists in the air in frustration.

I never cry, it's just not in my nature. But for some reason, on that walk that seemed like to take an eternity, I felt the hot tears pour from my eyes like rain durin' a hurricane. I quickly wiped them away with my sleeve before slammin' my front door open. My ma was sittin' in the livin' room chattin' with one of her girlfriends, and barely noticed the fact that I was so frustrated. Without acknowledging her, I rushed into my room and slammed the door shut.

I threw myself on my bed, and buried my face in my pillow. Before then I never did this, but I heard that if you screamed into your pillow, no one hears it. So, I let it rip.

"Emily," My mother called from the living room. "Is everything alright?"

Well, that obviously failed. "I'm fine ma," I grunted as I threw my pillow on the ground, and buried my face in my hands. What had I just done?

_**And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.**_

_**And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.**_

_Get over your hill and see what you find there,_

_With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair._

I had locked myself in my room until the sun started to set on the golden trees that I had been admiring earlier, by the end of the day I thought they were stupid. My mother called me for dinner three times, and I finally gave in and told her that I wasn't in the mood to be doin' anything and she left me alone.

"Emily," My mother called me from the hallway three hours later. "Come out of your room."

I grunted. "No."

"Emily," My mother said in a more stern voice. "Get out here, there's someone here for you."

"Tell 'em I'll see 'em later," I said impatiently.

"Emily, get out here _now_ before I force myself in there." I didn't doubt my mother, so I opened my bedroom door. "They're outside." She added as I angrily walked to the front door.

The first thing I saw when I walked out was Soda. Usually he just has the audacity to walk into my house and sit on my sofa until I come out of my room, but this time it looked like he actually knocked. He looked just as upset as he did back at the DX.

"What?" I asked a little too harshly.

He sighed deeply. "Ya know somethin'?" He asked.

"What?"

"You're right." He got closer to me. "It wouldn't have been right."

He rested his forehead on mine. "I can't believe I never noticed that you've always been here," He said. "And how you always will be."

And then, we kissed.

_**And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.**_

_**And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.**_

_Get over your hill and see what you find there,_

_With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair._


End file.
